Holy Sanity Batman
by Evelyn Rogue
Summary: Jim Gordon gives the Justice League a crash course on the true meaning of sweet insanity, and they quickly learn Batman isn't the ONLY scary Gothamite. (One shot)


Gotham city, how to describe it?

A dingy old town with worn out buildings, corrupted denizens, and a serious bat problem?

No. That might be how the outside world saw it, but the Gothomites themselves viewed it from a whole other wacky perspective.

To the townsfolk, it was an old but prosperous city; with a few bad apples but typically good people; guarded by a knight in shining black armor.

Many people held this ideal close to heart, as wrong as it may have seemed at times; and James Gordon was no exception.

The Commissioner saw hope when the city was plunged into darkness, continually waiting for the coming dawn. Sure the bad days may be more ample and frequent than the good; but in the end, it didn't matter... Not to him, and not to most of the others who called the city their home.

It was a particularly chilled night in Gotham, the clouds shrouding the moon in a ghastly veil as they often did this time of year.

However, while some viewed the clouds with a frustrated glower, it made the Bat signal much more obvious in the night sky. That in and of itself was a blessing in disguise.

Usually, depending on where the mysterious vigilante was, it took him under twenty minutes to respond, but the fluttering of a cape in under five minutes was a welcome surprise to Jim.

The commissioner spun around, tan cloak snapping in the breeze; but he wasn't met with the black clad bat, but rather the clown colored Superman.

The air electrified to his right as the flash skidded to a stop, sending a small wave of pebbles and grit off the lip of the building. The comissioner raised an eyebrow, but the procession of heroes wasn't quite at an end.

A wisp of green in the shape of a man slowly drifted through the concrete roof, the martian manhunter solidifying to the right of superman.

A brilliant and irridescent green glow glimmered through the night air as the green lantern touched down lightly on the roof, a green bubble formed from his ring escorting none other than the green arrow.

If the commisioner were being honest, the green arrow was one hero he could welcome into his city. He was as mysterious as Batman, boasting many of the same righteous morals.

The entire league was present, on this roof, under the dismal glow of the Batsignal, and to say the GCPD commissioner was surprised would be somewhat of an understatement.

Of a multitude of burning questions bubbling up in Gordan's mind, only one popped out of his mouth.

"Where's Batman?"

"Oh, don't tell me you're one of those 'stay out of my city' types!" The flash groaned. It was clear that the red clad speedster had gotten the 'Batman speech' on at least one occasion, and the irony of that statement wasn't lost on everyone.

"Kid, _everyone_ in this heaven forsaken city is _that type_ of person." Gordon deadpanned.

Not many Gothamites welcomed outsiders into their city. It was a cliche they took to heart.

"Batman's away for a few days, so we agreed to keep an eye on things here." Superman sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. His gray-blue eyes locked with Gordon's hazel eyes which bored into his.

The commissioner searched through his memory of brief and somewhat fruitless conversations with the bat, and one stood out in his mind.

"Ah, of course. I vaguely remember him mentioning something like that."

It had been one of those infuriating passing comments that Batman muttered under his breath while falling backwards off the building.

Suddenly remembering his reason for being there, Superman stiffened."So what's the emergency?" The man of steel demanded, ignoring Gordon's earlier comments about staying out of Gotham.

"Breakout at Arkham. The inmates are holding the nurses and doctors captive."

"Ah. The crazies. You must run into a lot of those huh?" Lantern asked, green ring pulsing against his white glove. His chuckle irked Gordon, the Gothomite in him both aknowledging the truth and vehimently hating the fact that an outsider was criticizing his town.

He bit the side of his cheek before forcing his pride down deep into his tarnished and heavy soul.

"You could say that. Probably more crazies than I can count." Jim shrugged, pulling his overcoat a little more tightly around his shoulders to obstruct the nipping wind.

"If I may ask, how on earth are you still sane? I mean all things considered... "

Flash muttered. Central City could be a mad house at times, but he'd never encountered something quite as hostile or wild as Gotham.

The commissioner visibly blanched.

_They have no idea._ He told himself.

"What do you meanall things considered?" The Jim grunted, crossing his arms defensively. It was time for a lesson these Justice Chumps had clearly not yet learned.

"Well. Uh- he means that. Um. Gotham seems like it's filled with crazies. And um. It's kind of a lost cause?" Lantern filled in. He knew as soon as the words left his big mouth that it was a mistake.

Gordon closed his eyes, counted to three, and snapped them open with a steely glare.

"First off. No one in this city is '_sane_'. Not me, not the mayor, not the citizens... _HECK! _not even Batman himself! We're all a few cards short of a deck." He vehemently and _loudly_ declared.

"_In fact_, our belief that there's hope for this hellish city iswhywe're Insane. Any person with half a brain in their head would have left Gotham to the crime lords, to the rabble, but ._not. Us!"_

Gordon leaned in Lantern's face, dark eyes reflecting both wisdom and Gothamite patriotism; while meanwhile, Superman realized the situation was going downhill.

He needed to diffuse it..._now._

He raised his hands appeasingly. "We didn't mean-."

"Yes you did." Gordon cut him off. He shot Lantern a glare that rivaled Batman's, and a passionate fire still lurked in his hazel eyes. "We may not be deranged, like Harvey Dent, or Sadistic like the Joker, but in one way or another... We've all gone off the deep end , and the only reason we stick around, is because we believe in this little thing called hope." Gordon turned his back and glanced at Bullock for back up.

The rather rotund man picked up the slack

"If you wanna keep what's left of your mental sanity before Bats gets back, don't let this city suck you in." Bullock spoke, his accent heavy.

"It will chew every last one of you up, and spit you back out like _handburger meat_. You'll become just like me, Gordon, or Batman. Zombified and looney enough to be admitted right into Arkham's solitary... and that ain't a pretty picture."

Bullock boldly poked Superman in the chest. "Just a friendly word of advice from an old officer." The former corrupt officer tipped his hat.

"Oh, and if you ever insult my city again. You aren't welcome back." Gordon added, finally feeling that the new comers were in their proper place.

"Now. A couple of deranged Gothomites are still holding a mental asylum hostage. I believe you all should get going."

The justice league sat there in stunned surprise. Maybe Gordon was right. Maybe there wasn't a sane person left in Gotham. How the Justice League had missed the memo was beyond them. Apparently they'd taken Batman's typical hostility and turned it into something only applicable to him; however, they'd been wrong to do so.

As they left the scene, Lantern glanced at Superman.

"I guess being scary's not just a Batman thing, but a Gotham thing. Remind me never to get on the commissioner's bad side."

* * *

Bullock laughed quietly, glancing at Gordon.

"Hey, Jim. You got 'em scared silly."

"That was the goal. They'll never survive if they think it's safe to swim with the sharks."

"You got that right, but come on Comish, you give good ol' bats a run for his money."

Gordon chuckled dryly, a sly smirk tugging at his lips.

"Well, I _did_ teach him everything he knows."

* * *

-A.N.-

Darkwolf, here. **I wrote this one shot oh so very long ago, but it needed some revising. This _is _a one shot. With the original release, some seemed to think it wasn't... But it is.****Anyhow, please let me know what you all think. Reviews make my day.****Another not: I would also like to say that I was inspired by the work -**

_R_eminiscewritten by Redbaron71

So check it **out, and ****I hope you all have an awesometastic day!****-Darkwolf.**


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